The eye is the lamp of the body. IF your eyes are healthy, your whole body will be full of light. But if your eyes are unhealthy, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness! Matthew 6:22-23 NIV
Raising Godly Boys in a Socially Driven World
Enter into any area where preteens and teens are present and I’m sure their faces will reflect the glow of an electronic device of some sort. The devices themselves seem harmless enough. A little entertainment never hurt anyone, or did it?
When I was a child Nintendo was all the rage in the world, it was fairly new on the market. There were only two games I liked. I wasn’t the most confident child, I struggled with feeling secure. I always second guessed if I was where I was supposed to be, anxiety would set in and wouldn’t leave until I saw a familiar face. Because of this, I was a crybaby.
I was and still am a highly sensitive person. When I had a rough day I could go home and if I choose gaming as my thing to do I was disconnected from the outside world. There was no WIFI, no internet, no account, no buddy to play with online. Just myself and Paperboy (my favorite game).
Today’s child especially boys have video games that connect them to their friends, they can not only play with them but can chat with them in a messenger type of way. They are connected all the time. Our boys are living in a socially driven world. This all sounds harmless until it isn’t.
Until they have begun to chat with an unknown stranger, danger lurking ready to steer them in a completely opposite direction than what you have taught them.
I have often wondered why God has made men so visual. Which leads me to my next point. Not only is the danger of strangers entering our homes via these gaming portals, but have you seen how graphic the characters are? How defined a woman is? How much is revealed? Have you really stopped to think about the main object of each game? The violence and actions that seem to lead the game forward?
It is easy to think my son is safe, he doesn’t have a Facebook, Instagram or Snap chat, I am protecting him. Or maybe the opposite is true, your child has a friend that has SnapChat and your kids want it. It is tempting to give in.
It is easy to think because we are raising Godly boys up right and teaching them right from wrong that they will be okay and make wise decisions. I think that is a trap we fall into and our choice to allow them something long before they are ready is us feeding them to the lions.
I didn’t realize until recently how wrong I was until I really inspected his games and had to set up a PlayStation account. My goodness. It was frustrating. I kept saying when I was a kid my gaming console operated perfect and it didn’t need to be connected to the internet.
You see kids are pretty innocent about most things until they have either been told by a friend or happened upon some things via the internet. Being that they are visual once a young child sees something inappropriate they are pretty much sucked in right then and there.
It starts slowly and it progresses as time goes on.
They can’t un-see and our fleshy nature wants more. It’s pleasing to the eye. The internet is a portal to darkness, danger and all that Satan has waiting for our boys. If they can grab them now at a young age they will probably have them for life.
Their lives will be redirected down a path God never wants to see them on. Once a boy has seen an image of a woman revealing to much of herself they like it and accept it. It has appeared on their games, so when they see it they become desensitized to it and what we become desensitized to we learn to be accepting of.
While trying to faithfully raise a Godly son I have taught him to guard his eyes and his heart will be guarded.
I have taught him that God has his wife out there waiting for him to meet one day. She will be thankful you saved yourself for her. I have taught him that it is not ok to look. And that it’s very inappropriate of women to dress provocatively. Even though I have taught him these things verbally I must back them up by protecting him now.
It isn’t enough anymore to keep them protected from the obvious things. We have to be vigilant while raising Godly boys in every little thing they see and participate in. We try as parents to find wholesome things that we as a family can sit down and enjoy.
There are only a small handful of television shows that we can watch together. I have noticed in the last five or so years the commercials are becoming provocative and full of sexual innuendos.
Sex sells in today’s world and it is everywhere.
I know in my heart this is the work of Satan to steal, kill and destroy them of their innocence. Which in turn takes them places they don’t need to go. And costs them way more than they have to pay. The long-term effects of our boys being exposed and drawn in are devastating.
I know many married couples that are in counseling for struggles against pornography. Wives that feel they can’t measure up to the images their husbands are addicted to looking at. Their intimate life robbed of the pleasure God intended for it to have. Because their husband is not satisfied with his wife’s performance.
We must consider when something that is seemingly good is really anything but. And ask ourselves will this cause a problem down the road? Are video games, and access to the internet something they should partake in? If not, at what age is it acceptable?
If we prayed and feel it is ok then at the very least we must limit our boys to the amount of time they have. We have to pay attention to what they are playing, and who they are playing with. Monitor it all. Set boundaries.
If we allow them device privileges then it is only wise to create responsibilities they must complete before they ever turn on a device.
Showing them from an early age that tasks have to be done is creating for them a realistic expectation of what life is like as a grown up.
I know boys that grew into men that have a hard time being a responsible husband and father because gaming gets in the way. The more I think about it the more uncomfortable I become with the gaming and device sensation. Not all things that are good always are. Too much of anything can be bad, especially in this socially driven world.
Dad’s Tip for Raising Godly Boys in a Socially Driven World:
Seeing inappropriate things at a young age will definitely ruin a young boy. That is how addiction starts. It’s not enough to know where your kid is going. It is best to truly learn if that person has the same thoughts and beliefs in raising kids that you do. Also, it is hard to tell your kids no. Especially to something that seems “sociable” but we have to for their safety.
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Are you a Girl Mom?
Pornography. Not a topic that is comfortable. We don’t like to talk about it. It’s kept on the ‘down-low’. We don’t know how to talk about it! If we don’t talk about it, then it doesn’t exist. Then it’s not a threat. Until it is. Aimee of A Work of Grace encourages us to fight this battle for our girls in 3 Things You Need to Know About Pornography and Your Child + Giveaway!
I am a January girl in love with Jesus, books, writing, ink pens, coffee, fall, blue jeans, and my goats. I have been married to my high school sweetheart for 21 years in September. We have two blessings of joy. Our daughter who is 18 and our son who is 12. I was 16 and he was 17 when we wed. We run a business together. I am currently writing my first book. I am the women’s ministry director at my church and I love it when women come together to do life.