Raise your hand if you are in this Momma’ Hood with me (Hi I’m Tiffany)!?!?! Mom of Boys, Mom of Girls, in the midst of this trial and error life of Biblical Motherhood.
Let me begin by saying I am not a mom of boys. God has blessed me with 2 beautiful little girls. They are sensitive and brave, loyal and creative and I am honored to be their mom. As we began the journey of Parenthood an ache began in my soul to stay at home. To do that meant giving up a career I had fought for and stepping into a new role. Being a Nanny for other families become my very heart?!?!?!
With childcare came Boys. Whew, boys are different than girls! And I love every second helping raise these 2 boys (who I have kept since birth) as my own flesh and blood. It has been a beautiful journey learning how to nurture and equip them – and a learning curve!
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Genesis 1:27 God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.
Boys are Wild at Heart
If you have boys you know – as soon as they have focused vision you have to watch everything around them! They put everything in their mouth to explore (way more than the girls in my world ever did).
When they are mobile they don’t just walk – they run and crash purposefully into everything they can. They climb and jump from everything they can find – never needing a lesson. I love watching them build and destroy everything they can create. They thrive on wild behavior.
It seems to be just the way they are wired and no amount of consequences has broken that in them.
Our Adventurous God created boys for adventure
I see a wild adventurous side of God – don’t you? There is beauty and daring in the way He created the universe to spin and tilt. Look at the shooting stars, the ocean waves, the creation of new islands through volcanoes! Our God is wild and adventurous!
No one would chastise this side of God’s character. Yet I struggled with this natural behavior in the boys. They would be in trouble so often for crashing into furniture and breaking things. I often wished they would be calmer (like the girls) and play quietly.
Then my husband went through a study by John Eldredge Wild at Heart. In the study, John explains this natural way God made men.
Our culture penalizes men for being wild at Heart – seeking out the adventure their soul longs for. The sensitive society we live in demands that men work a very sedate job, squash the urge to hunt and be rugged men and conform to a modern tameness.
As my husband went through the study I saw some things change in him and heard New confidence emerge. He came home every week telling me about his need to be a Real Man and embrace who God created him to be. He Longed for Adventure, to be Wild and rugged.
Proverbs 22:6 AMP Train up a child in the way he should go [teaching him to seek God’s wisdom and will for his abilities and talents], Even when he is old he will not depart from it.
This verse took on a new meaning to me. I needed to train up these boys to be men – instead of trying to force them to be tame like girls.
How Can we Embrace the adventure?
God was specific that He created Male and Female. In all of His creativity, God made Boys different than girls. Not to be rude, caveman-like wild savages, but adventurous. They love to throw and run and climb. It’s time we as a society (starting with moms) stop penalizing boys for being boys.
1. I began by acknowledging the real need that God put in them for adventure.
As the youngest boy (Let’s call him “S”) would throw a ball in the house (which is not okay) we would sit down and talk.
“S, God gave you such a gift to throw well. But there is a right time and place to use that gift. But you can’t throw toys at the girls. When you feel the need to throw things, you can go play in the backyard. I’ll throw the ball with you.”
2. Part of parenting is seeing how God created our little blessings and coaching to nurture their natural giftings.
I would never scold my girls for creating a beautiful necklace (though I would insist she clean up the mess and craft in the right place). In the same way, I needed to acknowledge how God created my boys and give them direction about where and when they can be wild and adventurous.
3. I also needed to plan times and venues that will mold their adventurous side in a godly way.
For us this looks like:
- Letting them play ball
- Running with the boys at the park
- Taking classes that are mechanical and hands-on
- Roughhousing in the backyard with them when all else fails
- Planning ways to make school lessons more hands-on and mobile
Raising godly boys to be godly men is tricky in our sensitive culture. We have to equip them to embrace the adventurous nature God instilled in them in a godly way.
What are some ways you embrace the adventurous side of your Boys?
Resource for Moms:
Finding Hope and Joy in My Marriage eCourse Giveaway Tiffany Montgomery of Hope & Joy in Christ!
Tiffany is a Jesus Girl with a passion to Encourage and Equip Wives and Moms through practical Biblical Discipleship. She loves to unite with biblically minded women to grow their Christian Marriages inside her growing Facebook Community! Join the community here!