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“Anything is a blessing which makes us pray.” -Charles Spurgeon

Mom, I don’t know about you, but the very thought of Raising Godly Boys is enough to bring me to my knees in prayer. If you’re reading this, I’m guessing you’re the same.

My boy is one of the biggest blessings of my life. But when I think of all he is faced with in this world, prayer quickly becomes an “only option” for this Mom’s heart.

One of the huge challenges on the “boy side” of my life, has been to teach him how to be both tough and tender – and not by the world’s definition. I don’t care one bit if my boy is considered a manly man or tough guy, nor do I care if he is viewed as weak. What I do care about is if he is growing into the man that God has created him to be – and that includes being both tough and tender.

I don't care one bit if my boy is considered a manly man or tough guy, nor do I care if he is viewed as weak. What I do care about is if he is growing into the man that God has created him to be - and that includes being both tough and tender.

Raising Godly Boys to Be Tough Men

Here are some key areas I regularly pray for my Son as the Lord grows him into a tough man.

  • His relationship with the Lord. A tough man is spiritually tough. He will fight against evil as God is with him and that he stands for God’s word uncompromising.
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9
“Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.” Ephesians 6:11
  • That he becomes a hard worker. I pray he understands the value of hard work and does it with the right heart as unto the Lord. We talk about Dad as an example who always does what is necessary to provide for his family, no matter what that looks like.
“And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men” Colossians 3:23 
  • A tough man is responsible and free from excuses. For him to believe in being a “man of his word” no matter how that impacts him. That he is willing to confess sin and truly repents from any wrongdoing.
“In whose eyes a vile person is despised, But he honors those who fear the Lord; He who swears to his own hurt and does not change” Psalm 15:14
  • His perseverance. I pray he would be tough to persevere in his faith, marriage and in raising godly children. That he would “fight the good fight” with the Holy Spirit’s leading and not give up.
“Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us” Hebrews 12:1

Raising Godly Boys to Be Tender Men

As far as raising my boy to be a tender man, I often focus on these things.

  • For a tender heart towards the Lord all of his days.  Oh, how this Mom desires her boy to be sensitive to the Lord’s leading in his life! That he would have a soft and malleable heart and that God would continuously break down any walls raised up. I pray he would be F.A.T. in his relationship with the Lord.  A tender heart is Faithful, Available and Teachable. A tender heart can be used mightily for God’s Kingdom!
“Because your heart was tender, and you humbled yourself before God when you heard His words against this place and against its inhabitants, and you humbled yourself before Me, and you tore your clothes and wept before Me, I also have heard you,” says the Lord.” 2 Chronicles 34:27
  • That he would be tender towards his wife and children. God desires him to be compassionate, kind and tender to his wife and children. To train and correct his children in love. We should be praying the same!
“Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.” 1 Peter 3:7
“And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.” Ephesians 6:4
  • I pray his tenderness would be evidence of Christ to others. We study and teach the fruits of the spirit not only as character traits but also so that they would be evidence of Christ in his life. The fruits of the spirit show tenderness to a hostile world and can be light in the darkness.
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.” Galatians 5:22-23

Anything is a blessing which makes us pray. Charles H Spurgeon

Mom teaching our boys to be both tough and tender can be so hard in today’s world.

And if it hasn’t even been on your radar there is NO condemnation! Believe me, it was a lesson I had to learn.

READ ALSO  What is the Responsibility of Raising Godly Boys Really?

Not because I’m a good parent or super spiritual.

No, God spoke deep to my heart one day as my boy actually taught me.

Towards the end of an incredibly hard day, I shut the door to my room and sat in the dark.

This Mama was done.

The tears flowed and streamed down my face.

For whatever reason ( ahem only God 🙂 ) the door opened slowly. My then 7-year-old boy came in. He sat down beside me. He said eight words that changed my whole “boy parenting” focus.

“Mom, I’m going to pray for you now.”

He put his arm around me and prayed. He prayed for me, his siblings and his Dad. He asked for forgiveness for His part in making it a tough day and asked God to help our family and to “start over the right way tomorrow”.

You see, at that moment, my boy taught me what tough and tender looked like. God grabbed ahold of my heart and showed me what my focus needs to be – Intentionally Raising My Godly Boy to Be Tough and Tender.

Let’s pray for our boys.

Father, thank you for my Son. What a gift and a treasure you have given me in him! Lord, I pray your protection over him today. As he grows, would you help me to teach him the value of being a tough warrior for the kingdom with a tender heart tucked inside? I pray he learns to fight diligently wherever YOU deem necessary and overflow with the compassion of Christ while loving without compromise.

READ ALSO  Raising Godly Boys: Are You Ready?


Ok Mom, your turn! How do you teach your boy to be tough and tender in today’s world? Let us know in the comments below!

Resource for Boy Moms:

BRAVE for BOYS Bible Study a FIVE-LESSON Bible Study for BOYS (Ages 10-14 by Annie Pajcic of ThouArtExalted.Com!


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